


Memes..... in....... Spaaaaaaaace

by TinyPumpkinKisses



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Bisexual Lance (Voltron), Everybody is gay, Female Pronouns for Pidge | Katie Holt, Fluff and Angst, Langst, Like super slow burn guys, M/M, Memes, Slow Burn, Space Internet, Trans Pidge | Katie Holt, broganes, it's ridiculous guys just buckle up, shitposting
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-10-25
Updated: 2018-10-27
Packaged: 2019-08-07 06:17:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,155
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16402889
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TinyPumpkinKisses/pseuds/TinyPumpkinKisses
Summary: Lance realizes that since everyone is in space and time dilation and shit, whatever memes were relevant when the paladins left earth are no longer current or fresh. Hilarity ensues.Not really romantical, guys, just goofy fun and a bit of pining and crushing.





	1. Is this a new meme?

"Lance, you need to keep up. I need you to help me carry this stuff!"

 

Lance rolls his eyes in Hunk's direction, but still flashes a smile at the pretty alien ( _girl? Boy? What even is gender in space?)_ who he was talking to before turning back to where Hunk was heading. Heaving a cloth bag over his shoulder, he makes his way between patrons and tables, broken down speeders and personal haulers. _It's strange,_ Lance mused, _even across lightyears and in the middle of war, markets are always kind of the same. Food and mechanical bits. Clothes and jewelry_. Lance takes it all in while worming through the mass with a laugh and a smile and well timed elbows till he caught up with his friend.

 

Lance flops onto Hunk, draping his frame over the other boy as he bends, inspecting large chunks of what looked like rocks or glass. "Huuuuuunk. We are supposed to be finding FOOD. Not another gift for Shay." He pouts at the offending rocks. "We've had to eat goop for the past THREE movements! I know she is your girlfriend or whatever, but this is approaching the literal worst!"

 

Hunk straightens and glares as Lance rolls unceremoniously off his shoulders. Or, tries to glare. It's always hard to be more than mildly annoyed at Lance. Especially when his dramatics are, as usual, wildly misdirected.

 

"First of all, Shay is not my gir-"

 

"Ah! Nope! Nope no bup bupbop bip bop. Bop!" Lance waves his finger in Hunks face, stopping his protests with his nonsense talk every time Hunk tries to edge in. "I don't wanna hear it. You two WATCHED the SUNRISE together. You ARE a literal ray of sunshine. Plus you asked Pidge to build her a special communications pod." Lance smirks. "Girlfriend."

 

"SECOND OF ALL!" Hunk breaks through, his blush of red slowly spreading over his face. "Why would you think she'd like _this_?"

 

Lance looks back at the translucent rocks spread on the tablecloth and shrugs. "I dunno. They're rocks? She lives in a rock? You want to avoid a _rocky relationship_?" Lances chuckles at his own bad joke.

 

Hunk groans, looking skyward as if to try and spot Allura floating somewhere above them in the castle and call her down to stop Lance and his puns. "Lance. Buddy. It's salt. Just, large chunks on it. We can grind it back on the castle."

 

Lance, undaunted and now invested in the whole "gift for Shay" thing, spreads his arms wide over the whole selection of…. Salts, it seems. "So you'd say she…….CRAVES that MINERAL? Eh??"

 

"….And what's that supposed to mean, Lance?"

 

"You know….. Craves…… uhh" Hunks blank face finally stalls Lance. "It's like…..this OLD ASS meme" Embarrassed, Lance tries to explain. "There's like, this goat…. I guess? And-"

 

"Wait. Wait wait wait." Hunk interrupts. "Where did you even GET this new meme?"

 

"No no! It's not new! That's the point. Though," he picks up the rock Hunk had selected and licks it, "I remember something else  about being sal-" Lance stares off in the middle distance, a look of horror starting to morph his face. "-ty"

 

"Well, it's new to me." Hunk remarks while paying for the now licked chunk of salt, plus a few extra. "Heh. I guess you could say the whole ship craves this mi-"

 

"HUNK!" shrieks Lance, grabbing is arm.

 

"WHAT?" screams Hunk, trying to grab his bayard and still keep the bags of food he was holding from flying everywhere while he scans the packed market for where the danger is coming from. His face is forcibly wrenched by Lance until they are smooshed together. Lance's eyes are blown wide, and his voice wavers when he finally speaks.

 

"Hunk….. We are behind on the memes."

 

"What?" Hunk tries to disentangle himself from Lance, as they are drawing odd looks from passersby.

 

"Hunk, it's been ages! Whether it's doboshes or decapheobs or years or MONTHS  WE DON'T KNOW WHAT THE NEW MEME IS!" Lance's voice is high pitched in his panic and Hunk tries his best to herd his friend away while he has his, well, ridiculous meltdown.

 

"What if 'Compiling' is no longer relevant? Huh Hunk? Or or or 'Swerve'? We don't have access to the freshest of memes!" Lance lets himself be steered through the streets, now muttering quickly to himself. "Even the idea of a 'Fresh Meme' is simply a reoccurring resurrection of a meme dating back to the early 21st century I mean it is such a integrated part of understanding the layers of meaning and complexity of this style of social interaction and-"

 

"How do you even know all this?" Hunk has stopped them at a vegetable stall a bit away from the main thoroughfare and sets Lance to mechanically filling his bag with whatever Hunk hands him as he rambles.

 

"It.... I mean, it was from that grab-bag of files Pidge recovered from the Galra database about Earth's Kerberos mission." While it was disheartening that they weren't able to find any more information about Pidges family, the entertainment set sent with the Holts and Shiro on the Kerberos Mission had brought back Earth music dance parties and movie nights, so it wasn't a complete loss. "It was Matt's, I think?" Lance shrugs. "I dunno man. I was bored and I don't have projects like you or Pidge. OR train like Shiro and Keith. Plus memes are kinda my thing."

 

Hunk smiles, patting his haul and scanning the market for any stalls he missed before turning and gesturing back to their pod. "Lets get back to the rest of the team so you can share your revelations with them. Who knows? Maybe Pidge can find us a space Internet!"

 

That makes Lance's eyes grow wide. "You know what that means, right?" Lance grabs Hunk's arm and dances him through the market, crowing.

 

"Space. Memes!"


	2. Ch. 2- Enter the Pidgeot

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Team Punk works to connect the castle to the GGG for the glory of memes

"-but with how the different arrays are within the castle you would think that there would be a wa-"

Lance rolled his eyes at the tiny pacing form in front of him and fell backwards onto the couch again. At first he was excited that Pidge had latched onto the idea of getting onto the latest of galactic crypto-forums, but the reality of her involvement…..

"-already contains broadcasting abilities because of the communications rig that's set up, so we would just need to continu-" 

….left too much room for boredom. 

Lance shuffled his long body around till he could also get Hunk in his range of vision. APPARENTLY there was a galaxey's wide communication network which they used to connect to the rest of the coalition. APPARENTLY what used to be cutting edge technology 10,000 years decapheobs ago was not quite up to snuff in our modern galactic era. APPARENTLY-

"Well I found out more about the network in place." Hunk crossed into sight, frowning at what he was reading. "It's mostly in and around systems that are inhabited. Hmm. Makes sense." Hunk spun on his heel to avoid walking into Pidge, swiping through messages on his tablet. "But most systems that are inhabited are controlled by the Galra, which could be a problem. Those areas are generally serviced by the," Hunk squinted at his holotab, "Galactic… Galra…. Grid? That can't be right…" 

Hunk paced out of his range of vision again. Trying to watch both him and Pidge at the same time was starting to give Lance a headache. They were doing so much for his zany idea and he felt like a.... third wrench. Or something. And just connecting to comnet in space didn't necessarily mean that there were memes in space, so what if it was all for nothing? Lance sighed and flipped over again. He felt Blue nudging him in the back of his mind with a comforting purr, reassuring and helping him fight his spiraling thoughts. Lance perked up. Well, if it turns out there are no memes in space, then it's high time someone brought some! If he couldn't find new memes, he'd CREATE THEM HIMSELF, BY BLUE! He sat up, ignoring Blue's soft chiding about liking her to a deity [like hell I can't who is going to stop me!] just in time to see Coran join in the technical fray, his normally cheerful face contorted in exasperation. 

"Now, Number 5, the ferrous quafflenezther here SHOULD be able to directly link into this... grid with the help of the mishafield sensor. The thing is, that directs the sequencing of our internal queefs to a bi-futnatural patterning, and you know what they say, queefs natural, not queef BI-Futnatur..….. Is something funny, Number 3?"

Lance had doubled over on the couch, unable to contain his giggles. "Queef?? Seriously? Is that what it's called?" He fell back on the couch laughing, oblivious to the deadpan looks the others gave him.

"Try and be serious, Lance, we ARE working with outdated technology trying to find space internet for you." Pidge said, now cross-legged on the floor and typing, "Besides, it just means 'server' in altean. Or, a kind of server? What if it's how the pings are coupled…" Pidge brought up a schematic of the castle and proceeded to ignore the others.

"I mean, I would be ok with just saying server instead of…. You know." Hunk's eyes caught Lance's and he hid a smirk. 

"WHAT'S WRONG WITH QUEEF?" burst Coran. "It is a noble name and the system was entirely reworked by my Granpappy when he was designing the Castleship! Why are the TWO of you laughing now?" Coran's mustache was now twitching as he watched the two boys falling over themselves on the couch. "Pidge! Explain! Is this one of your Earth-isms like the milkshakes in Lance's yard?"

"I can't believe I am putting up with this for some stupid memes" the small girl muttered.

"Wait! Ooof Hunk, get off of me!" Lance extracted himself from the couch. "STUPID memes? Memes are not stupid. They tell an important part of the sociology and history of a culture!" Lance drew himself up to his full height, posing in a way that definitely looked noble. 

"Pfffft. You can tell much more by looking at their programming. Memes are funny and all, but be real." Pidge cracked her knuckles, stretching over her screen before diving back into her research. "The tech talks."

"WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAA??" Lance gasped dramatically. "What would the great moments of our youth be without 'That bird's gonna be delicious?' posted on every plant, tree, cactus, or locker at the Garrison? Or that one semester where we built a shrine around that picture of Caesar's horse and it blew up the comnet? Or just going through the comnet's hologifs to troll our teachers? Hell, where would we be without the word 'troll'?" 

"Why are we talking about trolls?" 

Lance launched himself at a bewildered unsuspecting Keith. "Keith! Finally! Maybe someone other than these techheads will appreciate my vision!"

Keith had still not gotten used to Lance having declared himself his friend. He just wanted to maybe have a quiet spot to stretch out and read on his holotab. Maybe even in a place where certain other paladins would be. He did not want Lance to hang dramatically off of him and rope him into…. Whatever argument he was having with Pidge and Hunk. He eyed Lance suspiciously. 

"Now, now, here me out." Lance drawled, arm slung over Keith's shoulder while the other gestured in the air above them. "Space Memes!" 

Keith blinked before turning to leave the way he came. "Nope. I had enough of that back on Earth."Lance's jaw hung open. "Awww c'mon! Seriousl-" 

"Not here too. Nope." Keith cut him off as he walked out. "Pidge. Hunk.” Keith choked a little. “Uh. worst of luck to you.”

"Team Punk can conquer any quandary! " they yelled in unison, "A superb challenge!" contributed Coran.

Keith shook his head. That was just what he was afraid of. 

\-------- 

"Guess what I just found out about your crush?" Keith leaned against the doorway of Black's hangar bay, unable to hide his smirk. 

Shiro cracked one eye open to glare at his brother. "I was meditating Keith. A paladin's connection to their Lion is of-"

"Uh huh. Tell Black I said hi." Keith interrupted, prodding to make Shiro drop his 'I'm the Most Serious and Commanding Officer Yep That's Me' face. "I have news." Shiro kept his face calm, then kicked out with his feet in a sweep to trip Keith. Almost got him, too, were it not for Keith's insane reflexes and (more likely) his sixth sense that all little brothers have regarding attacks from older siblings. He managed to hop back from the attack and STILL smirk at Shiro. 

"Well, what is it?" Shiro grumbled, getting up off the floor between Black's paws and trying to ignore Keith's sharptoothed smile at his rising blush.

"He likes memes."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for your kind words and comments! I am having a lot of fun writing this! If you have a favorite meme, leave it in the comments! <3

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for this journey. Next chapter.....????


End file.
